Wow, fancy meeting you here.
It’s definitely been a while.
English. What a dumb excuse for a language. So many things that we say, and say correctly, are stupid.
Stop me if I am wrong. What is a pant? I know my dog pants or he can be panting, and I know that I have a pair of pants, or more than one pair of pants, thus some pants. Can you have a pant? I want to go to the store and buy a pant, perhaps I can get them for half price, because I don’t want 2 pants, I want a pant. If you split the pants in half to make a pant, you are left with a leg or two halves, depending on how you split them.
I have a pair of socks, I a sock (When my dryer eats the other one.). I have a shirt, I have a tie, I have a suit (Which in itself could be considered singular but it’s several pieces to make up A suit.). I have a pair of underwear, can I get a underwear? A panty (Not that I wear panties or one at a time.)? NO you have to have a pair, but you can only wear one at a time. Perhaps we’ve been doing it all wrong? Could it be that we should be wearing two pair of underwear (panties) under our two pairs of pants?
If I were to split the pants, underwear, panties, would I use a PAIR OF SCISSORS? Can you have one scissor? If you split the scissors in half, you get two blades, or each would be considered half a pair of scissors.
I know people have complained about the whole set of rules that we have in the English language, hard and fast rules, that should be followed all the time, err most of the time, err some of the time.
You know I before E except after C, etc; among dozens of other stupid rules that sometimes do and sometimes don’t apply.
If I were to change my name to dan, notice the lower case d, I mean legally change it, would you still have to write a sentence with my name capitalized? It wouldn’t be my name, my name would be dan not Dan. It’s like when what’s his nuts, who used to be prince, but then changed it to a symbol, and then changed it to “The Artist Formally Known As Prince”, then went back to Prince?
How about the word “refuse”? I refuse to take out the refuse. Spelled the same, pronounced differently, means entirely different things. There are many many more stupid words that when pronounced differently, they mean different things, but I think you get my point.
From here on out I am going to call my pants by pant (unless I am referring to multiple). Scissors will now be scissor, and underwear will be called bob.
Now let me pull up my big boy pants and go to bed.